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Vampyvern
Commissions / Art trades open! I make a lot of mean & savage creatures with traditional ink that looks good on your walls and nightmares. None of that AI crap on my page. I WILL eat you for breakfast.

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It's time for a new post- Read if you can.

Posted by Vampyvern - March 31st, 2023


I don't know who genuinely reads these things but It's been a while since my last post, and I did Monster March (Again. But this time I actually finished it). I had the intent to stay away from prompts this year, but I figured at least one wouldn't hurt- especially to try and attract new interested eyes to my art. It had mixed results, but while my creativity and confidence is immortal, the truth is I've been in something of an art slump lately. It's all a mix - trying to earn more commissions and do more with myself, a slight pang of discouragement (mainly from how the art community has rotted, how a lot of people treat artists and each other in general, and social media is just getting worse and more selfish/narcissistic), and having a bit of a low cup myself personally. I don't really need an ego boost, I got the confidence already, but it'd be nice if my reach/business improved. I'm far from a sellout and a paywall, but I am the kind of person that does take notice/care for return and at least equal exchange to a degree. I do what I want, when I want, and on my own terms- and art is what I do. I chose to do this prompt myself and I didn't get paid to do it, but my art might go slower for a while simply because I feel like I'm doing too much free stuff and the return on it is getting shorter. By return, it's all encompassing for my art- The reception, comments, circulation, engagement, interest, etc. has decreased or stagnated depending where you look. My art is too good to be this underappreciated. I have a few loyal supporters that keep coming back and they make it worth it. I thank anyone who supports my artwork, whether monetarily or by following. It's very hard to feel motivated or appreciated right now, but those supporters are only one reason to keep going. It's not a good feeling when I feel like I'm doing too much free stuff- especially with theft and selfishness on the rise. I'm not a bot, so When a creator gets less engagement or business, they slow down on interaction and what they give out. Go figure. It sucks to put in so much time and effort into a drawing only for it to be vastly underappreciated- this is nothing new. I'm stuck in between 'its pointless to put in effort into something and not show it' and 'don't do so much hyper detailed art until things change.' I understand this creates something of an echo chamber, which I absolutely hate, but I wanted to get this off my chest- I'm not saying this to make anyone feel worse. but I'm continuing to focus on my work and put in the effort and that certainly won't stop my free content. However, with things getting harder and trying to push myself and feeling like I'm just spinning my wheels, I need to put it out there for posterity (especially before the dreaded Fool's day) because I like to be real. There maybe somethings improving here soon, but it would be nice if it sped up and got here now.


Anyway, back to my art before someone wrongly thinks I'm bellyaching or being pushy: I'm not going to post every submission here so If you want to see the complete collection, please check my Twitter. I did 30 yokai (would have been 31 but I accidentally deleted one) and they're a mix of pencil and ink. What I did submit, you can check my gallery for.

As always- If you enjoy my art, consider supporting me further by commissioning me or donating to my Ko-Fi and/or giving my pages a follow here. Business and traction is going real slow so it'd help me a ton- I'd appreciate it.


Comments

I relate pretty deeply, the art community can be sweet and supportive at times but sometimes the bitterness and selfish atmosphere can really get to you.
I used to be on Twitter to post my art, and frankly, I started to hate to draw. I was just doing it for traction and chasing that engagement notification addiction.
I relate to what you said.. feeling like you should post everything you put effort towards, but not wanting to put so much effort because you fear it won't get the "attention it deserves". Your art is very well done, you certainty shouldn't stop sharing your art just because you are underappreciated.
It's really good that you are still motivated, but if you start letting the traction get to you too much, then it can kill that motivation very fast. Don't push yourself to draw more than you enjoy, and don't expect anything to come from posting (and instead be pleasantly surprised when there is engagement). It's hard to do, (especially if you rely on commission money for income,) but its better to continue to love what you do and be underappreciated, than to be underappreciated and slowly give up.

This might be long, but it doesn't look long on my screen. Here goes:
I already know all of this and have gotten this advice before and I have my own take on it. I'm definitely not numbers obsessed or chronically online, but I will say it matters to some degree since I am an artist that relies on commissions for income. It's how I get new clients and it's how my work circulates. I've done art for over 25+ years now (professionally and leisurely) with these feelings never dying down- so I'm very familiar with this song and dance. This isn't the first time I've experienced it. I've baffled many people in my life and they're always so surprised I'm this underappreciated, and I'm no different in that puzzlement. Some platforms are better than others- Twitter is my largest audience and the place I get the most work and reach. Nowhere else has ever worked out for me like that despite putting in the effort. It's a toxic place, but it's the internet and I am very selective with who and how I interact there to manage that insufferable craziness. I'm a solution and results oriented person, so I never intend on giving up or stop sharing, my art is amazing and the world needs to see it. I always have other projects and things to tend to. I post what I want, when I want and I always do it for myself. While I do understand how social media works, I'm not an ass-kisser, people pleaser, algorithm panderer, or clout chaser- and that's partially why I'm under the radar is because I'm so headstrong about doing things on my own terms. However, I can't deny I'm tired of going super detailed all the time because it's in my nature and style. It's a double edged sword and a choice, but I've kept going all these years and I got my ways of dealing with it. I have a lot of problems with the community (from personal to conflicts of interest), but I am always happy to meet nice/genuine/supportive people who take a chance on me and maybe make a friend from it. I'm aware every artist ever always says that and it might sound repetitive or empty, but I'm speaking for myself and I mean what I say. With everything unsavory going on in this backwards world and a space I try to conduct business in as a working artist plus having a near empty cup myself, I'm focusing a bit more on myself. Things have been indeed slower and while it does take time, it still isn't pleasant. I'm always aiming for things improving as I put in the time and effort- I've just been a bit more insistent for a better return, especially at my age. I'm not losing sight or focus at all but I also don't wait around or waste time. I strongly believe in the ethics of fixing something yourself if it isn't working out, and that in itself is never ending. As far as telling myself 'Don't expect anything-be surprised later', I tried that once when I was younger and it didn't work for me well- it doesn't fit my personality and only made me feel worse. I'm a realist at heart anyway but I do have standards & pride. I never know who is looking anyway, so my art stays up (even if thievery has gotten more prevalent). I don't do this for attention or validation- No, I don't need anyone's validation or approval- but I do need to live too. Art is my income and life so I it take a little seriously (without being annoyingly over professional). I haven't been putting myself out there as much this year due to mental fatigue, but I'm rectifying it soon and that was partly what my prompt was for was combating exhaustion. I haven't been in the right place at the right time with most things this year and the art market is so oversaturated, but all I do is keep going (But I've been very clear on immortal motivation lol). At the end of the day, I always move on. I'm not losing sleep, but I do find getting sometimes is cathartic and allows others to remember that I'm a real person too with feelings and it's a crucial part of the process. There's been a few times it has felt like a sinking ship, but I've always turned it into the Kobayashi Maru (Something that seems like a no-win situation, but can be successful if you rework it yourself). I do appreciate those that are patient with me and attempt to present some form of understanding. Thanks for saying my art is well done - if you know anyone that wants a commission or can use my talents on a project feel free to share my name. If you'd like to continue this, you can private message me. Additionally, you can look at my other socials and connect there too.

@Vampyvern Related to using your talents on projects, have you tried the Collabinator yet, or attempted to find people who are working on projects for big Newgrounds events and need an artist? That might be one way to use this site’s own functionality and culture to your advantage.

Yes- I've actually browsed it, but I haven't done many deep dives yet or committed ample time towards doing so. It's been on my radar to plug myself in there at some point, as well as some other places too :)